One thing I’m really happy about: I’m recognizing an “old-self” aspect of Bugs coming back. The reserved, contemplative, concerned side of him.
He’s been choosing his moments carefully to approach me. He draws near slowly, looks in my eyes, purrs tentatively and briefly, and then goes back to OutTV.
I think he may be saying: “The crazypants pest is elsewhere at the moment, Ma. Are we still good?”
We are still good, dear Bugs. So good.
As we’ve been integrating Fang into the household – looking back over many of your comments throughout this process – I’m seeing a theory emerge. Cats are individuals. When it comes to the artificial world these two cats are asked to join – in this case, two neutered boys close in age but not exactly, coexisting in a small space with each other and a(n at-times-benighted) Bean – before a successful match can be made, before peace and harmony may reign, it’s necessary to recognize and honor different propensities.
This seems to mean, in Bugs’s case, that the Bean must honor Bugs’s Garbo-esque tendencies – his need for quiet, lots and lots of sleep, and alone-time – but to make space for him to approach when he wants to – at the same time as Bean honors Fang’s balls-out young-boy wild-and-crazy “it’s-never-enough-Ma” me-me-me goofiness.
And the boys need to know, in their turn, that Bean loves to touch them and Bean will touch them and they will simply have to learn to live with it if not like it. Negotiating on all sides.
Thank you all so much, dear readers, for mediating and cheerleading. This process would be unimaginable without you.
A bromance flowers?
It sure looks that way. In this moment, at least.