One Year Ago

To this very day – that’s when Bugs showed up.

It was the Thanksgiving weekend.  Saturday, November 28, 2009.  One year ago, to this very date.
It was the second anniversary of the death of a friend from ALS.  I’d just found out that another friend relapsed with cancer.  Another relationship in my life, a big one, had hit the rocks.  Again.  After a lifetime of shipwrecks, indistinguishable in their hopeless character.

It was time to take stock.

I decided I’d treat the holiday like a solitary retreat.  I canceled feast plans.  I wrote letters to self and others.  I thought long and hard about where I seemed to be going.  I didn’t much like what I saw.  It was time for a change.

Little did I dream that, heralded by the stench of bodily eliminations of the second kind,  change was to romp in early that cold clear morning.

I showed up to the downtown studio where a small cohort and I practice FELDENKRAIS®.  The vestibule was eye-wateringly unapproachable, on account of it stank.  We backed out, crawled in instead through a tunnel-like service closet.  After class, we cracked jokes about how we’d been reborn thanks to FELDENKRAIS – bursting outside through the same birth-canal we’d entered.

Later, as I was cleaning up the mess, its cause came bounding down the steps in the form of the as-yet-unnamed Bugs.  As I opened the door to sweep out the refuse, this little gray-and-white scrap streaked past.  Fearing that he belonged to one of the residents, I tried to catch him.  Fat chance.  May as well try to stop a river.

Turns out he was a stray.  The building residents had been feeding him (not well, judging from the eliminatory evidence), and otherwise caring for him not at all.  Well, I thought – things can’t stay this way.  Welcoming my FELDENKRAIS peeps to a supposed place of healing that was, in reality, a pestilential evil-smelling den.  “I’ll take him to the shelter,” I said to the resident.  “Be my guest,” she said.

I called him, he came rollicking up, I gathered him in my arms – strange to think, now, as I recall how wild he really was.  And, together with the filthy pillow he’d been crashing on, an assortment of life-forms – him, me, unseen fleas, ear-mites (the pic below ain’t nuthin, Bugs’s ears were black inside from base to tip), worms, mange, and heaven-knew-what-else – we were off.

Except — I paused at the first stoplight.  To the shelter?  Really?  Or – might I take him in, instead?

The answer came back simple.  “Yes.”

And that was that.  Forget allergies, parasites, aversion.   “Yes.”  That was all.

To this day I really can’t imagine how I had the nerve.   Well, who knew.  This must be what it’s like to have kids.  You just can have no warning what it’s really going to be like.  So.  In a whisker of time, there I was, transformed from a hurt, angry, frightened child in an adult body – to an adoptive parent-guardian and humble student.

How life happens like that, while you’re making other plans.


About nadbugs

Anita loves cats. This must be because she, too, has had nine lives. She’s been dancing since she could walk, she was a commercial artist and advertising producer, she earned a third-degree black belt in Aikido, she is a drummer with the Afrique Aya Dance Company, she is an attorney, and she’s a meditator and a devoted student of Nonviolent Communication. She also spent one lifetime sidelined with a devastating back injury in 1992. Since then – FELDENKRAIS METHOD® to the rescue. The FELDENKRAIS METHOD is all about dreaming concretely – thinking intelligently and independently by way of a gracious and kind physicality. The work affords all who study it a process by which to reach, with movement, into the mind and the heart, to make nine lives into one whole being.
This entry was posted in Feldenkrais, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to One Year Ago

  1. Pingback: The Turning Of The Season | catself

  2. Pingback: Savoring Every Second | catself

  3. I’m glad you did, too 🙂

  4. Pingback: Bugs & Bean Update | catself

  5. Pingback: Three Years Thankful | catself

  6. lahgitana says:

    Isn’t it funny how he came to you then, rollicking?! And the now-Bugs, not much cuddly-Bugs? He knew who you were then, my dear. Knew you were The One. <:-]

  7. Pingback: Two Years To The Day | catself

  8. Pingback: Six Years Now | catself

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s